I've been meaning to write about this for weeks now, but with construction on
our apartment and awful morning sickness, it wasn't on the top of my list. Now
that I’m finally writing, I don’t really have the words. I never really dreamed
about how I would feel when I found out I was gonna be a mama. Years ago, when I was in my early teens, I had a surgery and the drs told me that I may never be able to have children. Everyone who knows me knows my dream was to be a mom. I've always wanted to be a stay at home mom. Someday. Hearing that children may not be an option for me was crushing...and I slowly became used to the idea of not having kids. When my husband and I started dating, I was quick to let him know that I may never be able to have kids...thinking if he knew that about me, he'd wanna move along to the next girl. His response floored me. "I want you for you; not for what you can give me. If God choose to bless us with children then great, if not, I still want you." I knew right then he was a keeper! ;)
Since we didn't think kids were an option for us, we really didn't think much about timing. We just went about our life as normal. Late February, I just had a feeling that I could be pregnant, but highly doubted it since I couldn't have kids. I decided to take a test late one night, and told my husband to check it since I was too scared. A few moments later, he came in and let me know that in 9 months we'd be parents. I fell into shock and denial. I started crying and saying that it wasn't possible. About 10 different tests later, I finally came to the conclusion that it must be true. We couldn't have been happier. Since miscarriage was a high possibility, we decided to wait a few weeks before telling anyone, and once we were out of the danger zone, we couldn't wait to share the news with friends and family! I’m 13 weeks along today. My
due date is November 15th, and I’m so looking forward to having a little one of
my own for the upcoming holiday season! I’m trying not to worry too much about
everything that could go wrong and just trust the Lord and His perfect plans.